My goal today was to break 1:40:00 in the half. Going into the race I was nervous that something ridiculous would keep me from meeting that goal. I know I'm trained. I trained hard. But I've been having some problems with my pelvis not moving properly, which gives me pains down my butt and leg. That was a worry. I've also been getting random side ache pains that will occasionally keep me from running more than a couple of miles. Another worry. I also randomly have hard days where running more than a couple of miles just isn't in the cards for my legs. Another worry. But thankfully none of those things came up today.
I went out wanting to stay with the 3:15 marathon pacer for as long as I could hold on. I figured I'm bound to have a hard last few miles - it always happens - I may as well have some time in the bank. I realize that this train of thought is sort of "frowned upon" in the running world, but I felt like I needed to just really push myself and see what I could do - I know I can run sub-7:30's, but how many of them can I run? I can run sub-7:15's for a 10k with a side ache and still have some in the tank and I've trained a lot since then so I should be able to hold 7:25's for a while!
I kept with the pace group through about 5 when they pulled ahead a bit. At that point I couldn't quite find a group to run with - it seemed I was always relatively on my own and had no one to work with. Fine. Through eight miles I was at a good 7:30 average pace - roughly a minute and a half ahead of my 1:40 goal at that point. Running up 19th was rough, though. I saw Jim, Laurie, and the girls and Kinsley was holding out my fuel. She's an awesome helper and gets so excited to hand us stuff during our runs. But then I saw Megan just beyond Kinsley. All of the sudden I was overcome with emotion. I'm not sure why it hit me like that, right then, but it may have just been the realization that she was at the Boston Marathon when the bombs went off. She was there. So many people were injured and she was right there. Thankfully she wasn't physically injured but she could have been. And so many people were. So messed up on so many levels. People all over the course were holding signs in memory of and in support of those who lost their lives, were injured, or emotionally broken in the Boston events. Runners were wearing shirts/shorts/headbands/socks with all sorts of love for Boston. And then I saw Megan. I started to get choked up and I just felt like I needed to hug her. So I did. I stopped right after grabbing my twist from Kinsley and I gave her a hug. Continuing up the hill was really hard. I actually had a mini asthma attack, which I haven't had in about 10 years. Not sure if that was my emotions getting me or what but I nearly panicked. I felt like my wind pipe was siezing up and swelling and I wasn't going to be able to catch my breath. Somehow it went away, though, and I was able to get to the top.
I was hoping to use the downhill to get a little kick and jumpstart the last 4.5 miles of the race. But my right hamstring cramped up and changed that. Getting close to mile 9, I was seriously contemplating stopping. I didn't want to get over to the other side of the river and HAVE to stop and be stuck. But then I realized how mad I would be. So I kept going. And it hurt bad. I was able to run through the cramp, but I had to completely change my form to ease up the muscle. Once that let up my muscles were exhausted from being used oddly and my knee was killing me - it felt like it was literally going to burst. Those last few miles were slow. Really slow. The only thought that got me to a point where I could pick up my pace again was, "if I run faster, I can stop sooner." And that worked. I was able to pick it up again around 12.5 and finish strong.
My goal was to break 1:40:00. I ended up at 1:40:31. It is disappointing to have started so strong, to have had all the stars seeming to align with none of my initial worries coming to, to have such a lead on my goal pace, and then to crash and burn and miss my goal by only 30 seconds. I trained hard and I know I'm trained well enough to break 1:40. So irritating... BUT even though I missed my goal, it was still a personal record. And I AM happy with it.
Now I need to get training again for the next one so I can kick 1:40's ass.
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